What’s missing in this kitchen? Of course, there’s no chesterfield sofa

Chesterfield Sofa

What ingredient is missing from the latest series of Masterchef: The Professionals? Yes, you’ve guessed it: a chesterfield sofa. What might otherwise be highly- entertaining and addictive TV viewing is let down by the absence of this iconic piece of English furniture. Why did the producers overlook this fact? Well, your guess is as good as ours. Maybe they thought a traditional chesterfield sofa wouldn’t suit the exposed brickwork and industrial-chic of their new minimalist kitchen, but we can’t help feeling they missed a trick. If they used a contemporary chesterfield sofa, then they’d have been cooking with gas.

Masterchef: The Professionals is in truth the least effective iteration of the Masterchef brand. It lacks the hype and schadenfreude of the celebrity edition, and can’t really compete with the desperation of the amateur version – though the standards there are becoming so good and professional that it’s hard to spot the difference between the two. But this series, missing chesterfield sofa aside, has actually reinvigorated the tired format. You can’t put that down to cheeky-chappie Greg Wallace: he’s simply doing what he always does – cracking jokes and polishing off the desserts.

Maybe it’s simply down to the introduction of the normally-assertive Michelin-starred chef, Marcus Wareing. He’s reputed to be one of the scariest and most-intimidating chefs in the country, but he’s not bared his teeth so far. Maybe he’s saving venting his Northern spleen for the final – here’s hoping. Thank goodness then for Monica Galetti; you wouldn’t want to get on her bad side. Her wild eyes alone are enough to make a grown man cry. Perhaps she should direct that crazy stare at the trendy producers who forgot to book the chesterfield settee.

So who’s likely to be cooking up a storm in the final? Who’ll pass the final invention test with flying colours? Will it be Scottish sous chef, Jamie, London sous chef, Sven, Scottish head chef Brian or one of the remaining semi-finalists Danny or Jonathan? Well your guess is as good as ours. They’ve all got their strengths and they’ve already demonstrated their weaknesses, so it’s still all to play for. They say it’s not the winning, but the taking part that’s important. Well, that’s nonsense. Of course it’s the winning that matters: otherwise why bother entering the competition in the first place? Maybe that’s the real reason for the omission of the chesterfield sofa. It they’d put one on set it would’ve blown the competition away. Modern sofas, however trendy and colourful, simply can’t compete with this particular mastersofa. Let’s face it not all sofas are created equally: some are just more equal than others.